Dear Anakin, I wasn’t promoted

Art by shorelle – used with permission.

Dear Anakin,

I’ve been working my butt off for a big promotion at work for a few years now, but I just found out my boss gave the job to someone else in my department who is way less qualified than me. How should I handle this?

Yours truly,

Overlooked on Ryloth

Dear Overlooked on Ryloth,

You deserved that promotion. You showed your bosses you were willing to work harder, longer, and smarter than anyone else to prove you were worthy of the position. You were entitled to it, and now that they’ve made their mistake, it’s time to make them pay.

Start by becoming close, personal and invaluable friends with your boss’s boss. Find the department manager, or better yet, the CEO, and buddy up to them. Once you’ve spent some time in their inner circle, it’s only natural to mention the promotion you were denied, and once your new friend hears about how unfairly you were treated, he or she will surely want to help you—that’s what friends do.

Ideally, your powerful friend will simply force the other managers to bring you on, even if that position is ceremonial and unrequired. Everyone else in your department will know how important you are because you’re there whether they want you to be or not, and they will never, ever cross you again.

If you’re interested in seeking more detailed advice on how to rise through the corporate ranks, I recommend seeking out The Tragedy of Darth Plagueis the Wise. Just don’t ask a Jedi, it’s not a story they’d tell you.

With hate,


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Anakin Skywalker

Anakin Skywalker

Guest Writer at Area of Effect
Anakin will be the most powerful Jedi ever. He promises you. His hobbies include going on wild bantha chases, being a hero, brooding, dealing in absolutes, and staring at the woman of his dreams when she asks him not to.
Anakin Skywalker

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